THOUGHTS: MONTH #109
"recording thoughts now less seldom and feeling rather in a limbo with a new life ahead in a foreign country and much public debate for the realization of my art installation in italy also not feeling very comfortable to record my thoughts afraid of being heard by passers"
THOUGHTS: MONTH #110
"recording thoughts right up to silvester's birth walking with livia as well as alone while strolling around in woerden under some rain and still considering all the political malleability that has affected my installation in italy yet at times being quite ashamed to speak too loudly not to be heard by other people and in this respect also stuttering"
THOUGHTS: MONTH #111
"recording my thoughts regularly yet being fully busy with the kids and focusing on my thoughts but still feeling not fully free to express them with alway the possibility of people hearing me and also recording my thoughts while briefly in italy to talk to the mountain community there about my installation and also reflecting on the very issue"
THOUGHTS: MONTH #112
"having little time to walk around alone now with baby silvester and livia to take care of basically making it a point to record my thoughts taking small walks to the supermarket or the hardware store always quite careful not to be heard and at times also recording my thoughts walking with myrthe ahead of me and pushing livia or silvester asleep in their strollers"
THOUGHTS: MONTH #113
"recording regularly my thoughts taking mostly small walks and feeling quite ashamed to speak out loud sort of minimizing my voice as well as stuttering whenever feeling like someone could hear me but nonetheless making general reflections as well as reflecting on my situation of an outcast"
THOUGHTS: MONTH #114
"recording rather fluently my thoughts despite several times being afraid to be heard walking alone in the town neighborhoods and sort of eating my words and even now also going out in the evening with baby silvester at times crying but nonetheless recording my thoughts not alway finding them quite sharp but recording them as in fact being thoughts popping up in my brain"
THOUGHTS: MONTH #115
"taking many walks at times distancing myrthe walking with baby silvester and recording my thoughts or myself walking alone with silvester and recording my thoughts both around our dutch village or in breda crossing the city and using the traffic noise to cover my voice from people possibly hearing me and at times getting some good reflections also based on the visual elements i experience while walking"
THOUGHTS: MONTH #116
"recording my thoughts walking alone with the kids in culemborg but then getting to go without the family to hamburg for a meeting with a film director friend of a friend and walking extensively through the city recording a lot of thoughts and thinking in particular about the dreadful carpet bombing of the city and in general the danger of ideologies"
THOUGHTS: MONTH #117
"still recording quite consistently mostly walking through our empty dutch town and feeling rather beaten by power holders of any kind but still maintaining solid within and without any expectation"
THOUGHTS: MONTH #118
"recording my thoughts mostly over the christmas holiday spent somewhat in exile from italy and reflecting on my state as a dissident with both large and small institutions such as also my parents recording many thoughts walking with livia asleep in the stroller even under the rain but then mostly focusing on august and recording far less during his time with us in the netherlands"
THOUGHTS: MONTH #119
"recording regularly my thoughts however feeling unable to fully think through them often carrying my kids but nonetheless feeling quite prolific and even thinking and getting a lot of new enlightenments while at home trying to remember them for latter reconsideration when walking"
THOUGHTS: MONTH #120
"recording my thoughts quite intensively at times walking behind my girlfriend or with one of my kids or even both also thinking of the thoughts i had while still at home and in general feeling very prolific especially now that i have most disappeared from the public"
THOUGHTS: MONTH #121
"still feeling very prolific in my head and fluently getting new thoughts but finding it challenging to record them having to also walk with my kids at times crying and also feeling i might get heard but nonetheless managing to keep on recording especially in a state of complete renunciation for anything worldly"
THOUGHTS: MONTH #122
"still a very prolific period yet still unable to walk in full isolation with both kids to take care of and pushing them in the stroller taking small walks reflecting mostly on my decision to cut with my ego and anything connected to it"
THOUGHTS: MONTH #123
"still quite prolific in my thinking but also getting a bit empty in my head after recording my lectures and still recording trying to take longer walks with both my youngest son and daughter in the pram and at times also finding it hard to record with much wind and bad weather blowing against us"
THOUGHTS: MONTH #124
"recording my thoughts consistently taking several walks with some decent weather still with both my small kids to carry but managing to get them both asleep in the stroller and managing to think further and elaborate the thoughts coming to my head still fully accepting my decision to go fully anonymous enforced by my reading of seneca and troubled by my friend davide insisting i should seek popularity"
THOUGHTS: MONTH #125
"very prolific period recording my thoughts despite having to be mostly with my kids pushing them on the stroller being forced to keep away from people due to the coronavirus outbreak and also venturing to rotterdam for a potential collaboration with the art academy there and roaming in the empty streets and onan abandoned railway finding at last the right solitude to go deeper in my thoughts "
THOUGHTS: MONTH #126
"a period feeling a little lame with still bad weather and still unable to fully walk and talk out my thoughts with proper reflection also with much wind erasing my recordings and my kids at time winning in the background but mostly used of it"
THOUGHTS: MONTH #127
"still recording consistently my thoughts but not having the right occasion to fully think through them with my kids to take care of during my walks and the big stroller to push and also many other people around in town with the coronavirus outbreak forcing them home with their kids and also thinking about this outbreak and the obsessive attachment of the most christian bourgeoisies to their old lives"
THOUGHTS: MONTH #128
"recording consistently my thoughts now with almost no one out in our dutch town due to the corona virus outbreak and reflecting about it while also making more general considerations coming to my head still at times unable to fully think through them with little silvester crying in the stroller but livia becoming very contemplative and more disciplined on our walks to the river or a park"
THOUGHTS: MONTH #129
"taking advantage of the nice spring weather to take many walks and recording systematically my thoughts despite having to also push the big double stroller with my kids at times also requesting my attention and in part also reflecting on the global lock-down due to the coronavirus pandemic and the need for a more stoic approach"
THOUGHTS: MONTH #130
"having quite many thoughts coming to my head especially now seen the unforeseen circumstance of the coronavirus outbreak distancing me once again from the alps and my project there and making all sort of considerations pretty much always pushing one or both kids in the stroller"
THOUGHTS: MONTH #131
"keeping up having quite some thoughts and trying to record them while walking my kids daily to one park or the other often having them whining in the background but nonetheless feeling rather prolific experiencing a state with zero expectations yet feeling quite rich and strong with my practice"
THOUGHTS: MONTH #132
"still spending much time outdoor walking my kids around and recording my thoughts despite little livia asking me what am i doing and despite feeling i might get heard with my thoughts at times being rather radical and some time not so thorough but at times getting some good insights especially in regards of social issues and ideologies"
THOUGHTS: MONTH #133
"still in the netherlands still with myrthe working from home due to the lock-down and taking care of my kids walking daily with them and daily recording my thoughts coming rather spontaneously and more and more just getting out any sort of thought thus not thinking of any consequences but just speaking out as true representation of a person's thinking"
THOUGHTS: MONTH #134
"intensively recording my thoughts with good weather to be outside always roaming around with my kids also going to utrecht for the first time after the lock-down walking on the empty roads and recording also there now also gaining some hopes of resuming my work in italy but also feeling rather distressed about all the new changes ahead"
THOUGHTS: MONTH #135
"recording my thoughts from the netherlands roaming around with the kids and with my hopes a little up getting ready to leave for mountains yet still facing quite some uncertainty as far as the political situation hindering the realization of my project there"
THOUGHTS: MONTH #136
"a very frustrating period waiting in the mountains for the permit to build my installation with the mountain community siding more and more with the hunter and with several far right attacks and yet managing to take walk with my kids and record reflections about my situation often being out of breath having to go uphill"
THOUGHTS: MONTH #137
"in the mountains not so regular in recording my thoughts with all the work done to set up the installation main structure but anyway managing to have sometime walking alone to record thoughts mostly related to the evil political forces and the part of the local population against me and all the love i am putting in the realization of my project"
THOUGHTS: MONTH #138
"walking with the kids back in the netherlands and finding it hard to record my thoughts having to entertain them but at last having livia starting primary school and getting more time to think through my thoughts taking little silvester for strolls"
THOUGHTS: MONTH #139
"walking a lot in the netherlands and getting some good thoughts still finding it hard to elaborate them with the kids but also going alone around with little silvester and getting thoughts coming one after the other now living in a sort of limbo having really no feelings nor expectations"
THOUGHTS: MONTH #140
"almost unable to record my thoughts now walking with livia talking mostly to her and only very much recording my thoughts when walking with little silvester in the days she goes to school and taking long walks especially on the dike getting several thoughts almost naturally"
THOUGHTS: MONTH #141
"regularly going out in the dutch landscape despite the bad autumn weather feeling quite dejected by the behaviour of an ideology intoxicated american art student trying to screw me over and reflecting on this but nonetheless having to walk kilometers to find the right moment to record my thoughts with my kids in the stroller being quite demanding and thinking in general of my total detachment from any social ambition and my natural duty as a parent and as the maker of my project"
THOUGHTS: MONTH #142
"still recording my thoughts getting over accepting my situation getting far worse now with barely any money to support my project but nonetheless holding strong and taking care of my kids finding at times hard to record my thoughts walking with them mostly talking to livia who became very fluent despite her young age"
THOUGHTS: MONTH #143
"recording thoughts also while in sweden waiting for august to do sports outdoor and taking walks in a perfectly still autumn landscape being able to get quite in depth and back in holland walking a lot but using all my mental energies to talk to little livia showing her around and explaining her things and only really being able to record my thoughts with her at school taking long walks with little silvester still however feeling distracted by all the negotiations to rent the venice apartment for a long time but very little money"
THOUGHTS: MONTH #144
"still recording quite consistently my thoughts other than at times my brain being concerned with the negotiations to rent my venice apartment and also spending much time talking to livia or trying to pacify little silvester both feeling quite ill and nonetheless having quite some thoughts to record despite having become a nobody and wanting to become even more so after rereading the whole of seneca"